19 May 2007

Saturday AM pot luck

  • J-Lo and her ass have been ordered to answer questions in a lawsuit brought by a television writer who says J-Lo stole his idea for a series about the modeling and nightclub scenes in Miami's South Beach. They should just order both of them NOT to make the show because it will definitely suck.

  • The body parts of man were found on the subway tracks near Lavonia Avenue in New Lots, Brooklyn (holla) early Saturday.

  • Oh Darwin, you little devil you... A man who had just robbed a Bronx jewelry store was struck and killed by a city bus after he tried to flee on his bike. I guess witnesses told WABC 7 that the suspect was "too busy looking at the people chasing him to realise he was pedalling right into the path of an oncoming bus." Better luck next time Jesse James.

  • Michael Moore takes 9/11 first responders suffering lung problems and other 9/11 related ailments to Cuba for medical treatment. Everybody here is pissed basically because they received better treatment in Cuba than they would've here. Oh, Michael, I hope you have someone else tasting your food and starting your SUV.

  • Gas prices hit new average: $3.20 a gallon. Isn't there someplace we can bomb to fix this?

  • Page Six, Staple of Gossip, Reports on Its Own Tale: I guess your boy Rupert Murdoch, The Post’s owner, had directed the Page Six writers to avoid stories that could be seen as critical of China, where he was trying to do business. Douche.

  • George Michael says he's hooked on prescription drugs - yeah join the club, bro.