24 July 2007

Brolly Envy

The PM monsoon yesterday meant only one thing... Umbrella Wars, Part Two.

I often laugh at how people run in the rain like its fire falling from the sky. AGGGGHHHHHHH!! Water!!!!!!!!!!!! It is quite silly how panicked some people get and even though I've been known to snark "its only rain" I too employed my enormously obnoxious golf umbrella yesterday as I weaved my way down Lexington to my favourite express bus stop.

Yes, I'm one of them. I can fit 4 people under my brolly emblazoned proudly with the name of my massive firm and all our powerful tentacles. But the bottom line is my umbrella is bigger than yours so make way! It's survival of the fittest out there. It's kill or be killed on these streets. It's raining and its rush hour. MOVE or I'll gouge you with one of my many metal tentacles!

My colossal executive wind-resistant golf canopy vs. your disposable $5 contraption frantically purchased from one of those West Indians with a broken shopping cart who seem to magically appear as soon as the first drop of rain falls in Manhattan? Ha! I win, you lose.

It's a jungle out there folks, give me a wide berth and show some respect for the King of The Umbrella Jungle.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

I want one!!! Where do you buy them??:)