05 September 2007

Don't be fooled by the rocks that she got,

she can still be a total twat

Back when Jenny from the Block was just Grace Santiago in Money Train and Terri Flores in Anaconda, she married a bus boy named Ojani Noa.

Now, some 10 years later, Jenny from the Block sued her first husband and won.

"sometimes i stick my thing in the cole slaw"

I guess Ojani was broke and shopping around a tell-all book about his 11 glorious months with J-Lo until they divorced in January of '98. Noa's book was to detail his first sexual encounter with Lopez, as well as claims that the singer had multiple affairs while they were married. And Jenny from the Block can't be having that. Because she know where she goin' and she know where she from.

So Jenny from the Block kept it real and sued the pants off her first husband that no one knows about and now he'll probably have to go back to busing tables.

"I'm down to earth like this
Rockin this business
I've grown up so much
I'm in control and loving it
Rumors got me laughing, kid
Love my life and my public
Put God first
And can't forget to stay real
To me it's like breathing
From In Living Color to movie scripts
To On the 6 to J. Lo to this headline clips
I stayed grounded as the amounts roll in
I'm real, I thought I told you
I'm real, even on Oprah
That's just me
Nothin phony, don't hate on me
What you get is what you see"
I realise no one should scour J-Lo's lyrics as if it were Whitman but one of my biggest pet peeves is when "lyricists" switch the order of sayings just to make them rhyme - for instance the omnipotent "what you get is what you see" line. Cheap.

So today an L.A. judge awarded the 39-year-old J-Lo $545,000 and also issued a permanent injunction barring Noa from ever publishing negative, denigrating or disparaging details about Lopez.

can i get some more water & pickles over here, Mr. Lopez

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