There are very few things more personal than eating, and if you reject someone’s food, you're pretty much rejecting them. Downing a regional delicacy with aplomb tells voters: “I’m one of you. I’m part of this area. Vote for me.” It's that sort of perfect bullshit these candidates live by.
So this fall, Giuliani has visited what seems like every diner in New Hampshire. Mitt Romney, whose idea of a late-night fridge raid is a bowl of cereal, has been ordering chocolate malted milkshakes. Stupid Hillary introduced calorie and fat counts on White House menus when she was first lady, but a few weeks ago in Bumblefuck, Iowa, she had a loose meat sandwich avec fries!
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“Running for president is like entering a competitive eating contest and a beauty pageant all at once. Candidates are expected to eat local specialties often and with gusto, yet still look attractive and fit.
Barack Obama, who was chubby as a child, refers to himself as skinny in speeches and barely touches fatty foods — except at events like the Iowa State Fair, where he ate caramel corn, pork and a corn dog for the cameras.
Those wanting to be president must never, ever refuse or fumble the local specialties, lest they repeat the sins of John Kerry who was dismissed as effete when he ordered a Philly cheese steak with Swiss in 2004 or Gerald Ford whom on a 1976 swing through Texas, he bit into a tamale with the corn husk still on.”