14 November 2007

Newsday Spills The Barley; Machalinski Rats Us All Out: The Party's Over

Anne Machalinski from Newsday blew up a lot of peoples spots today. She wrote an article basically giving you MAPQUEST directions to a few of Manhattan's über-secret underground speakeasys. That bitch!

Anne, do you realise just how long people kept these places secret?! And you just waltz in here and give everyone a map?!

They do say reporters will do anything for a story... So, her article starts:

"When The Volstead Act was passed in 1919, Americans everywhere looked for clandestine places to imbibe. Now, nearly 75 years after Prohibition ended, one of the original New York speakeasies, Chumley's, was recently shut down after sustaining structural damages. But other secret watering holes remain..."
I'm not one of these dudes who hates on bands when they blow up or whatever but still, shit like this is weird. These places are, or well - were, cool because they were somewhat secret and you had to find out about them by word of mouth.

Not to mention most of these spots aren't even big enough to hold crowds attracted by anything more than simple word of mouth interest, much less a goddamn exposé in Newsday! But then again, who the fucks reads Newsday? Hmmmm, maybe its not a big deal after all.

Anyway, Machalinski blows up PDT, The Back Room, Angel's Share and Milk & Honey, which most everyone knew about by now anyway, but I still hadn't been to The Back Room. My friend Matt and I always talk about this place. Now there'll be a line out the fucking alley because of this Machalinski chick. Damnit, Machalinski !

This is really gonna fuck up my gangsta lean. Now when I return to these spots all the psuedo-old cats sipping their mugs of Gordons and teacups of Bourbon will think I'm some new post-Newsday cat. Shits getting kinda hectic out there, fellas.

interiors of secret bars which may or may not be mentioned in her article

Happy Hunting, Bastards!


Anonymous said...

Do you know her? She's actually quite lovely.

Gotham City Insider said...

I find my blog more enjoyable if you embrace the conept of tongue in cheek before reading. Enjoy!

Gotham City Insider said...

concept, even!

Anonymous said...

Fair enough. You must admit that Machalinski is one sweet last name though.