26 December 2007

Newborn Babies Are Not Snakes!

You know for Christmas people send around these Season's Greetings/We Had A Baby cards?

Well, I'd always wondered why we measure babies in length rather than height.

It'll say:

Little Baby Jeremiah Bullfrog Johnson.
Born December 12.
8 lbs. 7 oz.
23 inches long.

It's that last part I have a beef with. 23 inches "long". Long?! Is it a baby or a fucking boa constrictor?

You wouldn't say I was 6 feet long, right? So what's the deal with the baby shit? It makes them sound like reptiles.

I realise the baby isn't standing up and walking at 3 days old, but we can announce their measurement as a height, like a normal human being and not a length!

Couldn't you just say "23 inches tall"? That sounds adorable! Little munchkin.

23 inches "long" sounds like you just gave birf to an electric eel.

Water birth is a method of giving birth, which involves immersion in warm water. Proponents believe this method is safe and provides many benefits for both mother and infant, including pain relief and a less traumatic birth experience for the baby. However, critics argue that the procedure introduces unnecessary risks to the infant such as infection and water inhalation.