04 December 2007

Why TMZ is everything that's wrong with the world today

Before my lucrative future in theater was derailed by The Doors, AC/DC and the Gibson SG, I acted in a few plays during my considerable youth.

One of the plays, well it was more like a skit, was about a reporter looking for his big break; a huge story. I forget the exact details but basically the reporter ends up on a bridge with a bunch of guys who want to jump. And he gets them all to jump so he'll have a story. And that's how the skit ends. It was a laugh riot. Everyone in that church basement went wild and told me I was onto something big.

Anyway, thinking back to the plot of this play reminded me of TMZ and why TMZ is basically everything that's wrong with the world today.

"TMZ" stands for "Thirty Mile Zone," a term which originated in the 1960's. Due to the growth of 'on location' shoots, studios and various talent guilds established a "thirty mile zone" to monitor the regulations of shooting throughout Hollywood.

The zone remains centered in Los Angeles around the old offices of The Association of Motion Pictures and Television Producers at Beverly and La Cienega Boulevards. It was often said that "Everything entertainment happens in the 'Thirty Mile Zone.'" So essentially, the "Thirty Mile Zone" represents the epicenter of Hollywood.

While positioning itself as an 'independent celebrity news site', TMZ is more widely regarded as a tabloid journal though is unique for its major corporate backing.

TMZ was the result of a collaboration between AOL and Warner Brothers. Both AOL and Warner Bros. are units of Time Warner. TMZ's managing editor is sleazy Harvey Levin.

All that is reason enough to back up my claim that TMZ is everything that's wrong with the world today.

You've got mindless celebrity worship. You've got mindless gossip and meaningless pablum. And above all, you've got reporters making their own stories.

Nine out of ten TMZ headlines are about a "photog" getting punched out by XYZ celeb. But it's TMZ's own "photogs" doing the damage!

You can't have a fucking headline about how some celeb is such an asshole because they smashed the camera of some paparazzi when the paparazzi is your own!!!

Aren't reporters supposed to report the story? TMZ's reporters are creating the story! They're creating their own reality and reporting on it.

TMZ's reporters are manufacturing the scene and setting the stage by shoving their mini DV cameras into the faces of these celebs, egging them on, hoping they'll freak out and give them something to write about it. (Where's Bonnie Raitt when you need her?) It's basically like celebrity entrapment; taunting them to get annoyed on camera.

Let's all stand in front of stupid Britney's car so she can't drive and let's hope she'll hit one of us with her car so we can say Britney is a lunatic. This sort of thing.

Eh, fuck everyone. Who cares.


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